so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize