Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
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