Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
