We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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