writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
