I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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