I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize