Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
