They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
