i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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