I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
