Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Come on in and take your pants off
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