Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I supernannyed him into submission
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
