ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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