Yo dont text me then not text me
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
