Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
