At least make sure they are 18
Why
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Randomize
