If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I think weed is turning my hair brown
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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