im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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