My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize