Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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