No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
