Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize