Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize