New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
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