Well apparently he's into motor boating.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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