hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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