He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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