youre lurking in front of me
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
