went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize