I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Man, jail baloney is awful.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
