i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
