I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Randomize
