Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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