"it" just moved
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize