You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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