i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
