Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
