get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
