there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
