i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
This is my gift to your gina
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
