I think scott just propositioned me for sex
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
