We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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