I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
