There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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