is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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