We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm way too hungover for life right now
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize