How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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