I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize