How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
